Band Etymology

Winston-Salem, NC – Ever wondered how your favorite band got its name? With a little help from Mara Davis’s Radio Free Lunch, the BPA, Inc. Research Department was able to put together a list of some bands and where/how they received their name.

Radiohead – a Talking-Heads song
Duran Duran – the villain, “Mr. Duran Duran” in the film Barbarella
Five For Fighting – a hockey penalty
B-52’s – a hairstyle
Black Crowes – original name was “Mr. Crowes Garden;" however, they were subsequently asked to changed their name to what is now under the urgency of their producer
UB40 – the unemployment form in the UK
Gomez – the name of a friend of the band’s
Widespread Panic – a nickname of John Bell, the lead guitar player and singer, in high school
Stone Temple Pilots – original name was “Stone Temple Pirates,” but Scott Weiland didn’t like “Pirates,” so it became “Pilots” Ed Note: What does Scott Weiland like?
Lynard Skynard – a high school coach of the band
Hoobastank – your butt stinks in ebonics
Butthole Surfers – in reference to a dog sliding its behind across the floor
The Village People – every member of the band lived in the same village
Green Day – the band’s fondness for an illegal substance
Death Cab for Cutie – part of the Beatles’ Magical Mystery Tour
Rush – a play on words alluding to the band’s frantic scrambling to come up with a name before their first gig
R.E.M. – Michael Stipe, the lead singer, pulled this randomly out of a dictionary; rapid eye movement: the stage of sleep where you actually dream (he thought it was cool so that's why he chose it)
U2 – the 1960’s surveillance plane

If you have names that you know off the top of your head, please comment!

Roids, San Fran, and This & That

Greensboro, NC – In case you were wondering about the recent trend of sporadic e-mails, I’ve been dedicating my nighttime hours to a candlelight vigil for Paris Hilton. Ok, on to some serious matters. I don’t know the WWE too well, but I’m sure that everyone saw the news on how Chris Benoit went on a murder-suicide rampage this past weekend. Just because Congress doesn’t deem the WWE a “professional sport” means it’s exempted from PED (performance enhancing drugs) testing. While that quack of a commissioner, Bud Selig, believes that he’s finally tightened the belt on steroid testing in baseball, wrestling officials and Congress turn their heads at the likes of Chris Benoit, Hulk Hogan, and “The Rock.” The Benoit murder-suicide may be a result of one of the number of side effects of steroids: “Roid Rage.” What if Jason Giambi, Mark McGwire, or Barry Bonds were in Benoit’s shoes this past weekend? It would be front page news everywhere! Instead, beat writers are infatuated with Jason Giambi “talking” to the officials of the Mitchell Investigation (a panel appointed by Selig to accumulate facts on steroid use in baseball).

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I’ve advocated for years that fans should not be allowed to vote for players in the All Star games, no matter the sport. “Fans” vote on names, not their 1st half actual statistics. For example, in 2005, Barry Bonds didn’t play in a single game until September of that year. Nevertheless, he was voted the All Star starter for the outfield that year. Same goes for basketball – don’t tell me Allen Iverson was an All Star this year. He sat out several games because he didn’t want to play for Philly. I, myself, like voting. But, it comes down to name over numbers every year. This year’s biggest snub has been Edgar Renteria of the Braves. He’s displayed the best numbers for any NL shortstop and he’s not even in the top 5 of voting. Jose Reyes, the current leader, definitely deserves to be in the game. J.J. Hardy, who had a stellar April and early May, is in second. He’s since fallen to mediocrity. Solution: MLB should stop handing out the ballots in mid-April. Wait until Memorial Day – that supplies the fan enough time to digest two months worth of statistics.

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This & That:
-- It’s quite possible that the Nationals may tweak their uniforms next year in preparation for the new ballpark.
-- No doubt about it, Jeremy Guthrie, plucked off the waiver scrapheap, should be the lone Orioles’ rep in the All Star game next month.
-- It’ll be interesting to see how many boats will be parked in McCovey Cove for the Homerun Derby in San Francisco. I’m sure we’ll see the “redneck yachtclub” out there: jet ski’s, pontoon boats, yachts, canoes, and kayaks. Nobody will be able to move out there. The only way that one will obtain a homerun ball is if it lands on their boat.
-- If the Braves aren’t 5 games over 0.500 by the break, expect them to be sellers at the trading deadline.-- Kudos to Dmitri Young for actually fulfilling a “second chance.” The football players (Tank Johnson, Pac-Man Jones, et al.) who are on their fourth and fifth chances will always be portrayed as villains (in my book).

Mile High Review

Greensboro, NC – After spending the last four days in the “Mile High City,” I didn’t notice one person out of shape. Due to the higher altitude, and therefore less oxygen in the air, God makes you be fit. I did a couple of laps in the pool, but at the end of each stride, I felt completely out-of-shape.

With the Colorado Rockies out of town, we decided to take the "laid back" approach to the weekend. After taking down six bottles of wine, guzzling an endless supply of mojitos, including one from Zengo (rated the best mojito in Denver), and topping our mornings off with Bud Oranges (a Bud Lite in orange juice), we weren’t really up for hiking in the nearby Rocky Mountains. Zengo’s top-rated mojito featured the normal mint leaves with rum (and brandi?) and lime juice. However, what separates this mojito from the rest is that a cucumber is perched on top of the drink -- and a hangover looms at the bottom. A very interesting combination: a cucumber and mint leaves. Nevertheless, it works!

A night at Morton’s capped off the trip. The ultimate showman, Alex Pearl, treated us young lads to French wine, gaudy steaks, and homemade desserts. If you haven’t been to Denver, it is a wonderful place to do some sightseeing and explore the mountains. It’s also a fantastic place to participate in outdoor activity, such as hiking, mountain climbing, and fly fishing. Too bad we were indulging ourselves in the sampling of Denver’s finest frozen concoctions to take in the encircled scenery.

How Not To Run A Baseball Team

Winston-Salem, NC – Just about everyone has their opinion on the Baltimore Orioles’ current situation. I’ve read every major source from ESPN to the Baltimore Sun to Fox Sports, and just about every baseball analyst has something to say about the Orioles’ decision to fire Sam Perlozzo. In my blog a couple of weeks ago, I mentioned how the Orioles signed a pile of “tier II” free agents this past offseason. This group of players combined with the “core” of homegrown players was supposed to thrust the O’s to their stated goal of 0.500 (winning percentage). It’s not the manager’s fault that the revamped bullpen as been defunct, or that the bats are colder than Fairbanks, Alaska in January. Here’s the issue: there is not one leader on this team to be the “clubhouse speaker.” I’ve noticed that in the past several years while attending O’s games; when something goes wrong on the field, the players put their hands on their waste and look dumbfounded. I’m pointing the finger directly at Melvin Mora. In other scenarios, I’ve seen Miguel Tejada just shake his head. Brian Roberts places his glove on top his cap. There is absolutely no emotion in this team.

Something else I've noticed... when the Orioles played the Nats in DC about a month ago, the Orioles were leading by one run late in the game and were up to bat. While the hapless Nats players on the bench all stood at the top step cheering Jon Rauch to strike out the last batter to prevent another run from scoring, EVERY ORIOLES PLAYER WAS SITTING BACK ON THE BENCH, ARMS CROSSED, COMPLETELY LIFELESS. Shouldn’t it be the other way around? This example is one of many why a baseball fan from the Mid-Atlantic area should root for the Nats, instead of the O’s.

Will Joe Girardi, the proposed managerial replacement, make a difference? With his dictatorial style, he should be able to instill some life into the current roster. However, the Orioles aren’t going anywhere if these players are still on the roster:

Aubrey Huff – There’s a reason why the Houston Astros, another offensively inept team, chose not to re-sign him.
Miguel Tejada – He’s clearly on the downside of his career. He can’t hit for power anymore. In 2004, I thought he was the best signing in Orioles’ history, but I was wrong by the end of 2005. Trade him for a top prospect.
Melvin Mora – Lacks intensity, always has an unhappy look on his face, again another mistake with the O’s front office giving him a 3 year deal.
Jay Gibbons – He can’t hit anymore, he’s useless in the field with Markakis usurping his position in right field. He’s still on the books for 2 years after this one.
Jay Payton – The O’s needed a defensive center fielder, but for $9.5M, it could have been better spent.
Kevin Millar – His best days are behind him. He’s the only guy close to a clubhouse leader, but his bat and glove are interchangeable with Gibbons and Huff.
The Bullpen – Baez, Williamson, Williams (released yesterday), and Bradford. All mentioned here have been huge wastes of cash. They're paid to each pitch an inning every other day and they cannot do that.

The problem with “blowing up” this team is that most of the players have mid-term (3-4 years) deals. Instead of signing Huff, Payton, Williamson, Baez, and re-signing Mora and Gibbons last year, the Orioles could have pooled their money together, which would total $96M. That would have been good enough for a top free agent. However, with all of their cash now tied to this group of players, the likes of Andruw Jones, Torii Hunter, Carlos Zambrano, et al will pass on them for greener pastures.

Out of the hundreds of articles that I’ve read on the Perlozzo firing, the one that I concur with from top to bottom is Ken Rosenthal’s “Nothing Will Change.” You can read the article here. As Rosenthal states, it all starts at the top: Angelos. Angelos has agreed to relinquish his authority to the newly hired COO Andy MacPhail. But, how many times have we heard that tune before – Mike Flanagan? Or that tune about free agent spending when MASN is in place? Or that tune about having a healthy farm system? I’m convinced, until Angelos sells the club, the Orioles are doomed.

Father's Day

Winston-Salem, NC – I promised that there would be no sap in this blog. I know that I’m a day late, but yesterday was Father’s Day. I’m sure that everyone has some encyclopedia of hilarious, serious, and educating stories from their father. One quick story about Pat, who most of you know quite well, ties directly to one of the main subjects of this blog, baseball. On Sunday, September 17, 1989, my dad took Kevin and me to our first baseball game at Memorial Stadium in the northern neighborhoods of Baltimore. The Orioles lost the game 7-0 to the Kansas City Royals as we sat in the left field bleachers enduring the hot sun. After nearly a full season of learning the rules of baseball on TV and grasping what batting average's and RBI’s were under my dad's tutelage, we were ready for to view the game in person. Kevin, who was 4 at the time, mostly sat on my dad’s lap during the game. As the fans surrounding us taunted Bo Jackson, the Royals left-fielder, we learned about bunting, stealing, sacrifice flies, and bullpens. I don’t remember specific plays during the game, but I do remember my dad pointing out specific players: Cal Ripken, Joe Orsulak, and Brady Anderson. I’ve been infatuated with the game ever since this day. If you’ve been to my place (either in Rockville or Greensboro) in the past couple of years, you know that I collect the ticket stubs of all the sporting events that I attend. The ticket for this particular game has been missing since the previous century. If there was one stub that I could have in my collection, it would be the one to my first game.

After a ballpark dog, some smuggled-in Gatorade, a cloud of fluffy blue cotton candy, and a lot of Royals base runners touching home plate, we departed the stadium. I don’t think I’ve seen as many people in one location as I did that afternoon. Upon returning to the car, my dad paid a quarter to each of the neighborhood kids for “guarding” his car, i.e. they didn’t snap off his radio antenna.

Growing up, many buddies would “hide” their dads because every acquaintance would be an awkward exchange of hello’s. Pat, as I’m told as he was growing up, has always been a laid-back guy. I’m very thankful for that. We share many things in common, but above all else, I’d say baseball is the glue that brings us together. For those of you who make fun of my baseball obsession, it’s not just some silly game. It brings generations of families together. Thanks dad, for taking me out to the ol’ ballgame!

Celebrities In Your Food

Winston-Salem, NC – I ate at a nearby Mexican restaurant for lunch yesterday and couldn’t help but notice the “celebrity” photos near the cash register. There goes Chris Paul chomping down on a stuffed burrito with the owner of “The Tequila Restaurant.” You see it all of the time in the “middle class” restaurants; those restaurants that aren’t 4 or 5-star (Morton’s and Ruth Chris), nor are they as tacky as fast food joints. These “middle class” restaurants are usually Chinese and Mexican restaurants where a waiter/waitress is serves you, but they make you “get up” to pay the check.

When you’re waiting in line to pay the check, glance to your left and you’ll see their prized collection of framed photos featuring celebrities and athletes. The celebrity usually writes some dry humored, one liner: “Your tacos are the best in town.” At “The Tequila Restaurant,” they had an impressive compilation of Wake Forest athletes: Chris Paul and Josh Howard from the NBA and Jim Grobe and other players from the recent 2006 ACC Champion football team. When we ate at a Chinese restaurant in Atlanta a couple of months ago, I noticed a signed photo of Francisco Cabrera – yes, the Francisco Cabrera who catapulted the Braves into the World Series in 1991 with his famous hit to drive in Sid Bream. Cabrera writes, “Golden Buddha, good food!” on his photo. Wow, great quote. It’s not just the restaurants who are into the celebrity craze. That same weekend in Atlanta, we went to a puppy store, “Puppies From Heaven.” There was an autographed photo of Usher buying his pup from the store.

Do these restaurant owners think that more customers will frequent their place if a celebrity or athlete has eaten there? "Yes, I only my Chinese food from the 'Peking House' because that's where George Clooney goes." Why do they hang it near the cash register where the customer won’t see it until after they’re done eating? Can’t the restaurant fill the walls with classier décor? Personally, I really don’t have a problem with the photos. It’s usually my companions, who are trying to get out the door, are slowed in their tracks. If they see a photo of a baseball player, they know my eyes will drift and I must see who it is. So the next time you’re gobbling on some of General Tso's chicken, and you’re about to pay the bill, look left, you might see someone famous.

When did Jason Kendall become so awful?

Greensboro, NC – I’ve been "getting into the routine" of highlighting a particular baseball team on Wednesdays. Speaking of getting into a routine, have you seen Jason Kendall’s batting average lately? It’s a paltry 0.199 – that’s below the “Mendoza line” fella. Also, no homeruns (no surprise) and only 15 RBI's. Take a look at his batting averages and on-base percentages when he was an All Star catcher with the Bucs:

Year B.A. O.B.%
1996: 0.300, 0.372
1997: 0.294, 0.391
1998: 0.327, 0.411
1999: 0.322, 0.428
2000: 0.320, 0.412
2001: 0.266, 0.335
2002: 0.283, 0.350
2003: 0.325, 0.399
2004: 0.319, 0.399

The man was an on-base machine for the small market Pirates. He was also their representative in 3 All Star games. It should be noted that in 2001, Kendall turned 27, which is usually the age when players “peak” in their statistics. While his numbers fell after his 27th birthday, Kendall regrouped in 2003 and 2004 in preparation for his contract year. When he was traded to the A’s in the 2004-2005 offseason, his numbers took a slight dip:

2005: 0.271, 0.345
2006: 0.295, 0.367
2007: 0.199, 0.240

Kendall is lucky that he calls a good game or else he may be out of a job. He's also making $13.5M this year; that's above and beyond any player on the Oakland squad. Kendall’s play calling is a direct reflection of the starting rotation. The A’s starting rotation, led by early Cy Young favorite Dan Haren, surprise hurler Chad Gaudin, up and comer Joe Blanton, cagey veteran Joe Kennedy, and Lenny DiNardo have kept the A’s in the playoff chase. Otherwise, with their below average offense severely lacking in all power categories, the A’s would be lingering with the Texas Rangers at the bottom of the standings. The “moneyball” scheme is still in place, despite being ranked 8th in on-base percentage in the American League. However, for the past couple of years when “moneyball” strategy has been followed, the A’s have never really had a “high octane” offense. Sure, they had some thumpers in Giambi and Tejada, but the backbone of the team was a solid pitching staff and a dominant closer. There’s no real difference this year. With their team loaded with cast-offs such as Shannon Stewart, Milton Bradley, Marko Scutaro, Jack Cust, and Mike Piazza, GM Billy Beane is working his year-to-year magic. I’m sure next year at this time, the A’s will be contending with players that other teams no longer deemed adequate. After all of the blockbuster free agents have signed this November, Billy Beane will make his annual plunge of “dumpster diving” to piece together another team loaded with undervalued players who can get on base any way that they can. Go ahead and sign Barry Zito to a 9-digit contract, the A’s will beat him twice the next year. When everyone assumed Beane was over his head in giving up Mark Mulder for “prospect” Dan Haren in the 2004-2005 season, check out their stats and salaries this year. Until Beane steps down, the A’s will be perennially contenders every year. And yes, I chose the word “steps down” because in his own words, Beane will never “leave for more money.” It’s not the method how he conducts business – just ask the Red Sox in 2002.

Where's the Southpaw Behind the Plate?

Greensboro, NC – I’ve been plowing through a stack of baseball books for my summer reading list. I just completed Diamond Dollars, which could be an extremely boring book if you don’t like baseball and economics. I’m currently reading The Baseball Economist by J.C. Bradbury, which is modeled after the popular Freakonomics, the lone difference being that Bradbury uses baseball examples instead of everyday life examples. One of his chapters focused on the “extinction of the left handed catcher.” What precludes someone who is left handed from being a catcher? The only positions that southpaws cannot or should not play are third base, shortstop and second base because a ground ball is thrown to first base from left to right. If the catcher had to make a throw on a force play or attempted steal (with the exception of 3rd base), all throws would be in a straight line -- i.e. no pivoting would be required.

We’ve heard some of the silly reasons commentators discussing the reasons why left-handers cannot be catchers:
-- A quickly thrown ball will fade in the direction of the catcher’s throwing arm. For a right-hander, the ball will tail toward the runner stealing a base, and for a lefty, it will tail away.*
-- The “framing” of pitches – so that the umpire is more likely to call borderline pitches strikes – is harder for lefties.*
-- The limited availability of left-handed catcher’s mitts prevents left-handed players from learning the position as they grow up.*

Throwing out the hogwash of the first bullet point above, Bradbury calculated the steals rate of runners attempting to swipe third base (where a pivot would be required). Using “frequency,” “state run expectancy,” “raw gain” and “weighted gain,” Bradbury has proved that, on average, stealing third nets the team about 0.4 runs per game.** It’s about 64 extra runs a year. And that’s only if the steal attempt is successful. It’s a small difference, but a difference none the less. So, with a better chance of stealing third, you’re telling me that’s the only bias against a left-handed catcher? There are numerous reasons to include a left-handed catcher in your lineup: a left-handed bat, a good arm can throw out base runners, a more obtuse angle to throw out wide leaders on first, etc.

Here’s why I believe there are no left-handed catchers in the majors. I’ll use Sean Attridge as an example since he’s left-handed. Before Sean “retired” from Little League to “put more time” into his basketball career, he pitched for his team, but he wanted to be a catcher. Sean bought all of the vital catcher’s gear and a left-handed catcher’s glove. In the major leagues, what type of player is the most coveted on any team? Answer: A left-handed pitcher! A Little League coach thinking along those same lines is not going to put his best arm behind the plate. He’s going to start the southpaw because they’re rare not only in the Little Leagues, but in the Major Leagues as well. Sometimes, as difficult as it may be, you have to look past the raw data and statistics, and visualize the circumstances on the diamond.

* Bradbury, The Baseball Economist, p. 31
** Ibid, p. 34

Left Lane, Move Over!

Winston-Salem, NC – Is there anything worse than being stuck behind a vehicle traveling 5 MPH below the speed limit in the left lane? Yes, it’s when you’re aboard a 4 lane highway (2 lanes in each direction) and the vehicle in the right lane is going the exact same speed as the one in the left; thereby forming a blockade. Honestly, I do believe that some people are unaware of the “drive on your right, pass on your left” rule. I will not list the certain types of people who violate this particular rule since some of the readers may fall into the categories. However, I believe that state troopers and officers alike should pull over cars, which are deliberately violating this rule. It not only slows down the traffic flow, but it is very dangerous. If you see a car behind you that it traveling faster than you (i.e. it is gaining on you in your rear view mirror), move over to the right! The only time that the left lane should be used is to pass slower cars and trucks occupying the right lane.

There are some drivers who breach this rule and later complain about it through the newspapers and talk radio shows. They go on to say that once the passing car circumvents them, by either driving on the shoulder or by tailgating a car in the right lane, it will spray it’s window washer fluid so that it’s remnants splash onto the left lane dweller’s car. Good! It’s a sign telling you that your “soccer mom” van should be in the right lane traveling 45 MPH, instead of the left lane of a 65 MPH highway. If somebody flashes their high beams when they’re behind you, it means scoot over! I, personally, have only used this method once because it was a dire straits situation. I only condone the “high beam method” if the violator is still in the left lane after a mile of refusing to move over. Sometimes, the fast car will flash its high beams and there's literally no space for the slower car to move over, so give them some time if they're attempting. Not only is a safer to stay to the right, but it improves traffic flow. As a daily highway commuter, if I’m stuck behind a left lane violator for more than 2-3 miles, it extends my commute by 5-7 minutes. So please, as a common courtesy to all, stay to the right when driving and only use the left to pass!

That Creepy Apartment Man

Winston-Salem, NC – This blog will only apply to those of you who have lived in a apartment community at some point in your life. I have noticed after living in three separate apartment communities, each community has their own “watchdog.” There is a guy, usually in the 45-65 age range, who you always see walking their dog on the premises no matter what time of day it may be. One of my buddies who lived in the Rockville complex on the floor above me was convinced that "the watchdog" actually worked for the apartment complex. You'll see this guy walking his dog at all hours of the day; while leaving for work, during the middle of the day, coming home from work, at midnight, etc. They'll be the first to report any suspicious activity. They act like some ocean floor crustacean by picking up (or if you're the dog, eating) your trash and litter. If you're in their "inner circle of trust," you'll get a 'wave' from them. I have to wonder... do they have a job?, how do they pay the rent?, do they ever leave the apartment boundaries?, do they have other friends? How much exercise does that damn dog need?

When my Aunt Maura and Uncle Brian were recently married, they lived in an apartment community off of Georgia Avenue and Bel Pre Road in Silver Spring. I would be willing to bet that Uncle Brian assumed this particular "watchdog" role. To assume this role, one obviously must have a dog and probably call it some unusual name, such as "Maw Maw." One must have erratic sleeping patterns in order to be omnipresent on the apartment grounds. In order to pay rent and still be ubiquitous on the apartment grounds, I suspect that you must have a seasonal job -- a teacher! Further, I think you have to be remotely disconnected to your personal family. It all adds up in this case! For now, I'd try to penetrate your "watchdog's" inner circle of trust, or for the rest of your life, you may have that "I feel like somebody's watching me" feeling.

The Legend of DP begins...

Winston-Salem, NC – When I was transferred down to our Winston-Salem office to coincide with our company’s launch, I met one of the most unusual persons in my life. My first introduction to "DP" was when I arrived at work at 9:00 a.m. on my first day in Winston. DP comes up to me as if she were about to introduce herself and said, “What is this, banking hours?! We start at 8:00 a.m.” Her current position with the company is “Contract Administrator,” not “Executive Vice President.” I countered with the response, "Well, we do make loans, so we're lending money just like a bank." DP was not amused even though I thought she was joking. Subsequently, the following bizarre encounters have occurred since my move down here:

-- DP calls my personal company shirt a “blouse,” especially on “Logo Shirt Friday” when everyone in the company is wearing the same shirt!
-- DP refuses to have lunch with KM (the only other person in the company below 35) because a “boy” would interrupt lunch conversation.
-- When DP and KM eventually had lunch together, DP would not allow KM to have any of the complimentary, “filling” bread. Later, she would also not leave a tip for the waitress for her "expensive" $6.50 salad.
-- The very rare time that I got sick at work and had to go home, DP caught me at the doorway entrance and proclaims “Uh, my sundial says 4:15 p.m.” while looking at her watch.
-- DP refers to me as “the boy.”
-- When I wore my yellow Tommy Hilfiger shirt with black slacks, DP commented to me that I’m wearing Wake Forest colors. I then told her that my brother would be attending Wake in the fall. She says, “Oh,” then quickly turns her head and starts talking to someone else in their cube.
-- When I was walking back to my cube from the break room with hot tea, DP proceeded to hold the door closed, thinking it was funny.
-- DP goes home everyday at lunch to feed and “talk to” her cats. I guess you can blame this one on me since I took away her lunch buddy. Further, she dresses the cats in baby clothes and shows the pictures to fellow co-workers thinking that this is normal.
-- DP had to have surgery sometimes last year for an unknown reason. A large tumor, the size of a slab of meat or the size of a keyboard, was removed from inside her body. She took a picture of the tumor! She framed the picture and it currently hangs on her cube wall!!
-- DP once told KM that her etiquette is pathetic because she doesn’t acknowledge her whispery “psssttt, hey KM” across the room. It is important to note that KM is one of the nicest people that I've ever met.

On her personal web page within the company, there is a quote that reads, “I really enjoy the creativity afforded me in this job,” DP stated with enthusiasm. “It’s great having a job where you’re able to do something you love.” Yeah, like annoy the crap out of everyone around you. The bullet points above are just a small sample size of the stories and encounters that I’ve had with DP. Check back in a few months for more peculiar scenarios.

Oriol-OH-s

Winston-Salem, NC – The Orioles have been the “hometown” team growing up until the Montreal Expos moved to Washington prior to the 2005 season to become the Nationals. I now had an excuse to jump ship from the Baltimore franchise whose wheels are turning, but they’re upside down. With the launch of MASN (Mid-Atlantic Sports Network) this year, many fans expected the Orioles’ front office to pour some of the new revenue into payroll. The marquee free agent “bopper” turned out to be the mediocre Aubrey Huff. But he killed Orioles' pitching as a Devil Ray in Camden Yards for the past couple of years! In addition, the O’s also added and re-signed several spare parts in Jay Payton, Kevin Millar and Jay Gibbons. Herein lies the problem – rather than doling out $9.5M for Payton, $2.75M for Millar, and $21M for Gibbons, why don’t you save that cash and overpay for an impact bat? These three guys are all interchangeable, both with the bat and the glove. Althought, Payton is definitely the best defensive player out of the three. There is a smorgasbord of center fielders in free agency this offseason: Andruw Jones, Torii Hunter, Mike Cameron, Ichiro Suzuki, etc. I don't want to hear from the front office, "We don't have the cash to pay these guys."

With MASN boosting the revenue stream, the O’s front office reacted by spending $42M to revamp a defunct bullpen. Danys Baez, the most expensive of those bullpen pieces at 3 years and $19M, has a 6.94 ERA through today. Jamie Walker, 3 years and $12M, continues to give up key runs in the ballgame like last night. Scott Williamson has been non-existent, hiding on the DL. By throwing money at a glaring need, the O’s figured that the new bullpen would yield an extra 7-10 wins -- putting them near their team goal of reaching .500. When I say “Orioles’ front office,” it’s a synonym for the beleaguered owner, Peter Angelos. Until Angelos hires a capable GM AND ceases to meddle, the Orioles will be nothing but 4th place stalwarts in the loaded AL East. It's time to quit leaving ashes in October all over one of baseball's crown jewel of a ballpark. The fans have seen the same losing product on the field for 10 years. Continue to develop the pitching and sign a superstar to cover centerfield. The Orioles' fans deserve better than this, even if they're "Baltimorans."

A Subtle Difference Over The Airwaves

Winston-Salem, NC – As a listener to both “country” and “rock” radio stations, there’s a subtle difference between the styles besides the music itself. Have you ever noticed the radio stations that play “rock” music employ 'hardcore' DJ’s, compared to “country” music stations who employ some cheesy characters? Your typical rock station has a morning show such as the award-winning “Elliot in the Morning” on DC 101, along with “The Wicker Show” on 98.7 Simon in Greensboro, and my personal favorite Mara Davis on Dave FM in Atlanta. All of these personalities cater to the mainstream folks, ages 13-40. Their fun, games, and contests are more prone to make fun of someone. If a contestant loses the game, there is no consolation prize. The rock DJ's are also not afraid to criticize a caller or avoid a certain issue. Contrast these broadcasts to your classic country radio station morning shows, “Wake Up with the Wolf with Leanne Petty and Chuck Marsh” in Greensboro or Jim London on WMZQ back in DC. These particular show hosts are all a bunch of cheeseheads. They have a greater propensity to laud their listeners in their contests. They also have a knack of praising celebrities when they do something right, such as some community work or if they write a song for their wife. Good for them, but let's not place the celebrities on a pedestal like everyone else.

I do like both types of music; hence the reason why I listen to both stations. But here’s where I think the difference lies. Throwing out the morning shows, for the remainder of the day, all radio stations usually just have one person running the show. With Mara Davis, I feel like I’m having a conversation with her when I’m listening to her midday show. Her direct and comical wit is entertaining. The same can be said of Sully (also of Dave FM) and Cerphe of '94.7 The Globe' in DC. Conversely, with Jim London of WMZQ and Gunner Jackson of 'The Wolf,' there is a ton of gag space. The lull is awkward, it's as if they’re saying words in between songs just to fill up space. After every song, Jim London gives the time of day by saying, “10:52 right now, 52 after 10, 8 before 11.” Is that really necessary? Tell me something funny, give me some country news out of Nashville, etc. Gunner Jackson has his two year old son introduce him in between songs: “Listen to my daddy on ‘The Wolf’ or I’ll bite ya.” Awful! Do something witty for a promo -- introductions like that make me not want to give you my ratings.

I say enough of the dense satire in these country radio disc jockeys. With the break-up of “Ben and Brian in the morning” on WMZQ, I’m not sure that I will ever be able to refer a buddy to “try country music” without lending them a CD.

Gangs N' Photos

Rockville, MD – Coupled with the warm weather arriving, there is a plethora of graduations, weddings, BBQ’s, etc. planned during this time of year. The infamous digital camera makes its appearance at all events. On the same token, have you ever noticed in a “pack” of friends that there’s always that one person with a camera? When you’re out around town, in a bar, or attending one of the aforementioned events, somebody in the group is the camera man or woman. Everybody wants to be in the photo and nobody wants to take the picture – unless it’s a solo photo.

To expand on this observation, why is everyone always flashing a gangster sign? Is everyone in a gang or is it just the cool thing to do? I thought the U.S. government was trying to crack down on gangs. When I attended the Kenny Chesney concert two months ago, I saw three separate occasions where girls (ages 16-22) were taking pictures of themselves in a cowboy hat! One was even blowing smoke.

To conclude, my guess is that with the advent of facebook and myspace, friends are checking out friends in the photos section. You may feel “left out” if you’re not in the peace pic. The person taking the picture, and thereby posting and tagging the specs on facebook, is the “grandmother” of the group. He or she isn’t portrayed as being cool. Conversely, the people with 1500 photos on their webpage are ultra cool. Why do people only make the most ridiculous faces when the lens is in front of them? While our government is trying to crack down on gangs, let's not keel over to these preposterous "Kodak moments."

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